On Sunday night my mom and I decided to go to a late movie at an area movie theatre attached to a high-end mall. The movie theatre is in the midst of a deluxe outdoor shopping area with a Cheesecake Factory, Urban Outfitters, West Elm and Crate and Barrel. I had a gut feeling earlier in the day to pray the St. Michael Chaplet. I pray it daily before bed, but my intuition said to pray it at 3 p.m. about 9 hours prior to when this incident occurred.
Upon leaving the movie theatre, my mom and I were robbed at gunpoint by a gang - all I had in my purse was a wallet with no money and about 10 prayer books: St. Jude, Infant Jesus of Prague, St. Michael and Marian Devotions. I said the rosary before the movie as we enjoyed the summer air on the pavilion.
I have been working through the dead weight of a lot of trauma in my life and as I was walking to my car before this happened, I could only think about how fat I am and what a failure I have been - I asked God to untie the knots and open me up to healing, but all I felt was disgust for myself and a desire for Christ's healing.
In the midst of this we were barraged by the gang and held up - I gave them my purse and by God's grace alone with the intercession of St. Michael, St. Jude and Mary we were saved. The gang members were almost frozen in place as they tried to grab us - all they could do was take the purse and run. They had knives and guns and they grabbed my purse and ran with fear after taking it - this was a miracle. I have no doubt that God intervened and had St. Michael and our guardian angels protecting us with Mary. Jesus was there.
And as we ran back to our vehicles all we could say was PRAISE God, the money did not matter - what mattered was our life and the beauty of life. The lesson of my heart - showing me how much God cares for me and my mom in this broken fractured world - and how even in times where evil attacks us - Christ is there. Even when people are murdered I believe Christ is fighting hard to stop the violence - and he gives watch over those injured souls - Christ fights for our souls...so even if death comes from the evil of the world as it did to God Himself, God is bigger than the world and HIS love is both personal and universal - all of the hardships - the pain of the past melted away - I saw the beauty and grace and infinite mercy of God.
I prayed to St. Anthony for intercession that if it be God's will my purse would be found so they could identify the culprits and give the police a lead so they could protect other people from being harmed. I also hoped if caught the young guns of this gang would have a chance at rehabilitation. While I understand the reality and I do not absolve them of the darkness - I recognize the factors in living in an area where the culture is gang activity, drugs and violence. This will not stop until the culture changes.
A miracle occurred when I received a call from a landscaper at 8 a.m. on Monday saying he found my wallet and prayer cards. He found a friends number in my wallet and through them I was able to connect to the landscaper - this Good Samaritan cooperated with the police who had to pick up my things (I could not go back to the area as I live in a neighboring town). This Good Samaritan is a son of a pastor who said he had to do the right thing.
The real beauty in the story though is the landscaper has been going through a hard time, a horrible time and he found my prayer cards - a handwritten one I wrote and it gave him hope and to him that was a Guardian Angel - bringing him peace.
Even in a robbery and the evil of that act - God used it for mercy and grace. God's light always overcomes evil.
I prayed for the gunmen and still do - because while they have chosen to do evil - I see broken, fractured souls in need of Christ and His healing - poverty, drugs, anger, greed are symptoms of a world not in communion with God, a world more in fear of darkness than of the light - and in the darkness they assume their is no healing - rather life is hiding - who we are and acting out the evils that test our hearts. I pray they will harm no one else. I saw these as young kids - initiation into a gang and that cycle of violence must be something we stop on an individual and societal basis - we must invest hope into hopelessness, love into forsaken hearts, peace into the battered, quiet into anger and a refuge for those in the cross fire.
This is not easy - to cure a dis-ease so rampant - especially with the bacteria is an evil at war with God, but God will fight for us and with us - we need to open our hearts - even if it is a small act of mercy and active prayer to help heal our communities and the world.
In North Carolina a majority of gang activity is a result of poverty from a lack of jobs after voids in Textile industry and poor government infrastructure and investment in communities - desperate people look to a system to make money - they become addicted to drugs and the system preys on those who are weak and in most need of healing. Yes there are some sects who are pure evil - drug lords and serial killers, sociopaths and psychopaths - but in many communities the crime is more a reflection of our not working to heal human hearts and fighting the root cause - which is abandonment, despair, inner turmoil, anger, PTSD and other factors.
There is no perfect model for fixing the fractured infrastructure of society itself when so many underlying factors exist - but I think we must try to stop the epidemic one person at a time. Of course for this to succeed it needs to be a mass movement - but until we look to value the life of every person as God values us while also looking at the greater societal needs - we will never find lasting solutions to problems rooted in human dis-ease.
Each person has value - we must actively work throughout the day to sow mercy and the salt and light of goodness and grace to others that cross our path - and when in times of extreme terror we must always remember God's presence. Even if rescue seems so out of reach. Remember God is with us - Christ HIMSELF died by the cross, yet HIS SPIRIT rose above death of the flesh - life is precious by relationship - love and mercy. God always commands His angels to keep watch over us. How can we love our neighbor as God loves us?
There are times in life when we cannot control the world around us - things fall apart and the center cannot hold. Innocent people often get hurt by another person's sin and corruption of heart. I have never been an advocate for worrying about dangers and snares of all the evil that can come my way. At the same time I have always tried to be vigilant in recognizing the reality of crime. We have to have a balance - Christ wants us to be aware that we are in a real spiritual battle with evil every day - but although satan might win this battle, God through Christ has won the war and we are armored by his protection. This protection is a protection of the soul and the flesh.
So why do innocent people get harmed when they are vigilant in prayer and wear the armor of God. Jesus is protecting us always...however the law of free will means that our life is intersects with others who do not heed God's call and accept His healing SPIRIT. God protects us - unfortunately our flesh lives in a world of where evil is at war with God's goodness, we as faithful members of HIS Holy Hope get caught in the crossfire. Evil searches to destroy the light - all the while knowing that darkness cannot fully destroy the light - it can dim the light, but the LIGHT of the world is Christ and Christ has already won the war.
We must never despair in this though - for Christ died in the flesh but the evil of the world. He is our triumphant king. Christ loves us every single living soul with His Sacred Heart - as if there were only one of us - while loving all of us in communion - what a great blessing. So while we must strive to chart our own path and be removed from the world and detach ourselves from the world - we are also to be of the world - by working to spread the communion of Christ by breaking the bread of MERCY and sharing mercy. MERCY is an antidote to evil, which is merciless. Mercy is simple and complex...it feeds our souls and unties the spiritual knots that keep us chained in darkness. Mercy is forgiveness and justice.
We live in a fractured world, where greed and corruption, addictions and anger have left many communities fighting systemic infections of evil and the consequences of the merciless acts of evil.
I use the word merciless but evil is the antithesis of mercy - it is a corrupted seed of darkness. Evil knows it cannot overcome the light so it tries to chain us to the fear of darkness. Darkness covers the light by stealing our peace through a merciless dagger of darkness into the light. Evil wants us to focus on fear, hate, self-loathing, poverty of spirit and material worth in the flawed currency of the world. It breaks down the spiritual infrastructure of faith and hope by turning our hearts to our deepest fears and caverns - in doing so we are distracted by the beacons of starlight in our souls and the eternal flame of the Holy Spirit always ready to heal and guide in trauma, injury of spirit, death of flesh and heartache.
Sometimes we cannot win the war on this physical plane. Millions die of starvation, disease, drought and gang violence, drug addictions and countless other MERCILESS acts of sin. Sin is not an arbitrary act of disobedience - it is a breaking of a contractually moral code built on the needs of the human spirit and our relationship with God and also each other. Sin is a poison because it divides us not only from God but from communion with our neighbor and divides our own heart and corrupts our true self. Sin is toxic - Sin takes on many forms but sin is most potent in our objectification of humanity and humanity's self-destruction of self through greed, violence and addiction.
Sin is the driver of the evil of the world because it misses the mark on how we should care for ourselves and each other. It misses the mark by placing the ego above the conscience and true self of the SPIRIT of our Soul.
Sin is something that is a dis-ease of the soul and many forms of sin are enacted because of a disease in the soul - particularly driven by fear and self-hate, envy and mental issues. Until we look to stop the crimes of sin by the root cause - the sin becomes a disease so strong and potent it is incurable by human hands - it morphs into a state so sinister and systemic that the only solution is killing the system itself.
I ask everyone who reads this post to look inward and search the darkest caverns of your heart with the light of the Holy Spirit and ask that knots are untied and repent your sins and ask for healing. Pray for healing for all the world. Seek small yet important ways to be a light in the darkness for those in despair - even if it is just leaving a prayer card or a message of hope on a stranger's car - or buying a meal for a homeless person or listening to a co-worker vent - life is full of opportunities for danger - but in the danger will we fall by the sword of fear or fearlessly rise in the MERCY of Christ.
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