The Blessing of the Eucharist

Today we celebrate Trinity Sunday
 

The Holy Trinity is something hard to define for unbelievers and believers alike, it is the truth, light and love of the world - justice and peace the divinity of God - three in one.  Though God the Father, God the Son and God the Holy Spirit are unique manifestations of God's infinite majesty - the Trinity is one God.  God is one, and Christ is God, the Holy Spirit is God - each incarnations of God - equal and working in unison - one God.

In the future I will write a discourse on this Holy Mystery, but tonight the Holy Spirit has placed in my heart a joyful desire to discuss the bounty of God's blessings and desire for relationship with all people through the Holy Eucharist.  Communion is where I humbly approach God, as a sinner, and am renewed by His Spirit and find the peace of Christ.
 

It is easy to distinguish Christ, Jesus as different from God the Father - and yes, Christ is God incarnate, but Christ is the Father and the Father is in Christ and the Holy Spirit is God that dwells in our hearts as a compass to His Mercy, His Law and His Peace and His Justice.  God chose to carve out his Spirit into the hearts of men by the passion of God the Son on the cross.  Jesus gave us so much more than the cross, which is extraordinary that Jesus - God himself incarnate not only was willing to live and dwell in the flesh - taking on suffering and resisting temptation - Jesus taught us how to live by the laws of God's heart and to find peace and joy abundant even in the midst of suffering and persecution.  He sat with sinners and drank with tax collectors - because he wanted to bring the lost into his flock so they could be set free from sin and find hope in God's eternal love.  God's wrath is born out of love, His justice is born out of love and His mercy is born out of love.

Jesus gifted us his lessons, his miracles, his endurance and even while preaching for the kingdom of heaven - He understood the feebleness of the flesh and our hunger - our desire of the soul for God and limits we find in fear - He understood the woe of not having enough to eat or a safe place to sleep.  Jesus was a migrant, a carpenter from humble means who understood the pressures of the temporal world and the infinite mystery and importance of eternal salvation.   God cares for us beyond measure - infinity is even too cloistered a word to describe the boundless love of our God.

God carved his spirit into flesh through the Blessed Virgin Mary and became man in Jesus - and in becoming man God willingly became a servant - a suffering servant who endured every test and every trial so that we can learn to find the truth in His law and also the grace of salvation.  God did this because of love - not duty - but love.  The Holy Spirit helped to form the world - God said let it be and it was so.  For Christ, God the Son, to send forth the Holy Spirit into the hearts of man - allows us to have a fullness of relationship with Our Father - the law is written on our hearts and our advocates - God - three in one is from everlasting to everlasting.

The Holy Eucharist is a remembrance of Jesus's Last Supper.  While the Last Supper is commemorated in all Christian denominations the institution of communion has been omitted or downplayed in many sects as not having any real purpose in worship or power through the Holy Spirit.  I grew up Presbyterian and while we did have communion once a month it was not a sacrament - but rather just something we did.  I learned the blessing of the Eucharist in the Anglican/Episcopal Church and the Book of Common Prayer.

In the Celtic Eucharist I attend we preface the Communion with a beautiful song:

"Be known to us dear Jesus in the breaking of the bread."

The Holy Eucharist is an invitation to feast on God's glory through Christ that binds us to the Spirit of the Word Incarnate, and kindles afresh the Holy Spirit in our soul.  It is a feast of Christ's persevering love and spiritual food that is everlasting.

Breaking bread with another person is one of the most intimate and blessed things we encounter in the simple joys and mysteries of life.  I have volunteered at homeless shelters and shared a meal with strangers - if I had not broken bread (shared a meal) with them I would have continued to have assumptions about their life - I would not have empathy and compassion for their trials and tribulations, addictions and sufferings - hunger and thirst - volunteering at the Salvation Army and seeing the variety of those in need of food and desperate to be fed both spiritually and physically constantly reminds me of the great gift of the Eucharist.

The night Christ was to be arrested and placed in the hands of death, betrayed by man - he broke bread and ate a meal with His disciples and in that meal - simple and unrefined was one of the greatest gifts Christ gives us from His Ministry - a meal commemorated that Christ lived - Jesus lived as a man who hungered and thirsted and provided for his flock spiritually and physically - He feasted on the eternity of God and told His disciples to focus on the manna of His Spirit which would be revealed in His death and resurrection.

To be served food from Christ in the Communion is a physical experience of eating the bread and drinking of the cup - but the beauty is the physical transformation into a spiritual recognition of God's grace in Christ and the sustaining of the Holy Spirit.

Many dismiss the Communion as having no power other than a simple remembrance - but I have found healing in the Spirit in the Eucharist - is it a magical event - no - but it is a reminder of Christ's peace and sacrifice and our call to feed all those who hunger for the Word and for bread - it is a coming together spiritually with God - sharing in a blessed meal.

To dismiss the Eucharist is to lose a part of the Spiritual gifts Jesus gave us - I know it will not lead to salvation - that comes from Christ alone, but don't we want to be feed spiritually to grow past our need for salvation alone - don't you hunger to have a relationship with Christ build on friendship and honor - love that transcends the fear of salvation. Christ is salvation. What we receive in the Eucharist builds on Christ our cornerstone and emboldens our spirit and helps pulls us away from the sins of the flesh in the remembrance of Christ's life, death and resurrection and feeding on his spirit with thanksgiving.  The Eucharist brings us into the Holy Way of his Life and a communion with God's very person - whether it is a symbolic rite as I believe in the Anglican tradition or a physical manifestation of the bread and wine.  To argue over those points is a division not from God but the machinations of man's hardened heart.

Whether or not you drink a cup of juice or wine, break bread (I have to use a gluten free wafer) if you believe in the Holy Spirit then you know His Presence is with you as you come to God's table - it is worship, adoration and communion with God's love!  What greater gift is there than that love.

The great gifts of the communion:
- Remembrance of Jesus's ministry and his love on earth and in heaven
- Remembrance of Christ's sacrifice and resurrection
- Remembrance of Christ's miracles - particularly I think of the feeding of the 5,000 - Christ feeds us body,mind and soul
- Call to love God's law and be obedient while also an open invitation to feast on HIS mercy and Spiritual food of HIS grace
-Call to ignite the fire anew in our hearts of the Holy Spirit
-Feeding us spiritually
- Call to repent in the confession we make before the sacrament
- Shouts of praise
- Rising above the pains of the world into the peace of Christ - I love how in the Anglican prayer book it says:
"This is the table not of the Church, but of the Lord, made ready for those who love Him and want to love HIM more.  So com, you have much faith and those who have little, Come because it is the Lord that invites you."

I think about the parable of the banquet - the Eucharist is God's banquet on earth - our invitation to praise him, be renewed and live in His mercy and break bread with God and our fellow man.

The communion allows our restless souls to rest in God.  It forces us to take an account of conscience before approaching the 'throne of grace' as I find the Holy Spirit, Christ and God to call us to the throne of grace when we repent.  It gives us new sight as we humble ourselves before the table and a bold faith through the renewal of spirit in the Holy Trinity.

I think it is vital to remember that Jesus himself - commanded his disciples to continue the communion and sacrament of the breaking of the bread in remembrance for Him.  As Christians we are called to remember Jesus and be present with HIM through prayer and the Holy Spirit - this is the great gift of communion. And in being present with Christ we are willing to serve Him more and love our neighbors as God loves us.

²⁶ Now as they were eating, Jesus took bread, and after blessing it broke it and gave it to the disciples, and said, “Take, eat; this is my body.” ²⁷ And he took a cup, and when he had given thanks he gave it to them, saying, “Drink of it, all of you, ²⁸ for this is my blood of the^[b] covenant, which is poured out for many for the forgiveness of sins. ²⁹ I tell you I will not drink again of this fruit of the vine until that day when I drink it new with you in my Father's kingdom.”  (Matthew 26)

Arise O God Poem of Mercy

Arise O God and Hear my Prayer
I cry out to you from the depths of my soul
I thirst for you as a parched land in drought
I am not worthy of your mercy
Still I beg for you to shower me with blessings of love, hope and forgiveness
Do not condemn my sins, but restore me to life so I may learn your ways
Teach me to drink of your waters and seek you in the mysteries of the Holy Word
Let me Glorify You in the majesty of your creation
I am destitute and unholy - cleanse my soul and loosen me from debts
Fill me with abundance so I may find your grace in love
Give me blessings of your fruit so I can be fed with Your Truth
Holy Spirit do not forsake me, in the Divine Mercy of Christ's wounds
Resurrect my soul and kill the sins of the flesh
Heal me, change me, purify me and grant me hope
Fill my cup and heal my soul
Shower me with love and I shall Shout YOUR GLORY to the highest heavens and the ends of the earth.
Praise be to YOU God of all Creation for hearing my prayer
May I receive Your mercy and find peace eternal
May the broken back of my labor woes be lifted so I can serve you and not the world
Praise be to God
Father, in Your Glory, Christ in Your Mercy, Spirit in Your Truth

Come Holy Spirit - Reign in my Heart

"Sing praises of jubilee, let the trumpets of joy resound, the descent of the heavenly host - the presence of our advocate the fire of our heavenly KING to sustain our hearts and guide our steps - in peace and hope the SPIRIT moves through our soul to transform our hearts.  The SPIRIT is a window to Christ's Sacred Heart and the Light of the Father's love.  The SPIRIT is a like a dove sheltering us from fear and able to ignite our hearts to take flight - with mercy, compassion, and wisdom we find fortitude to bear crosses in the name of the fire of love." A poem I wrote about the Holy Spirit

 
Pentecost is the convergence of the righteous law and infinite mercy of God's divine grace.  In my poem I use the word 'fire of love' to describe the Holy Spirit for the SPIRIT of God is a kindling flame - a fire that cannot be quenched from the world - it moves - it guides and it spreads love in our hearts like a wildfire - a wildfire - not of destruction but a fire that burns our sinful ways to ash and allows a new seed of love - love in Christ and the Triune God in our hearts. 

God is three in one.  God is Christ, God is the Holy Spirit - each are revelations of our Father's infinite nature of grace, justice and love. The Holy Spirit is God's indwelling of HIMSELF within our hearts - an unfailing GPS that if we listen and submit to the Holy will of the Spirit we will not only discover heavenly peace - but bear fruit abundantly - fruit of God is not the fruit of greed and ego - but love, peace, charity, fortitude, compassion...God works his TRUTH through the Holy Spirit.

Pentecost falls on the forty-ninth day after Easter (the fiftieth if you count Easter day - pente is equivalent to fifty).  For nine days after Christ's ascension into heaven the disciples prayed and waited patiently for the promised descent of the Holy Spirit.  God's timing was symbolically positioned on Pentecost - which is the Greek translation for the Jewish feast of Shavuot - which celebrates the handing down of the LAW through the Torah.  By giving us the grace of the Holy Spirit, God fulfilled his prophetic promises of salvation and to write the law on the hearts of men.  

Christ was a perfect sacrifice.  His life without sin secured the grace of the Spirit for all mankind.  Because the flesh is incapable of keeping the law and living a sinless life, GRACE is the only restoration fully communion with God.  In Grace we are forgiven - grace is a gift - a free gift of love.  It is not by the merit of our own works we are forgiven, yet by the grace of Christ's blood and Holy Trinity.  

Does this mean we get a free pass - NO!  A Jewish Rabbi I took a class with said he thought Christians focus too much on Grace with the gift of the law is a guide for righteous living and practical living right here in this realm and loving our neighbor as ourselves - the end game is not heaven but a life of peace on earth.

I actually agree with the Rabbi in many ways and I think he did not understand the truth of Grace in Christianity - many Christians abuse the power of Grace in the Spirit.  Grace means we are forgiven from sin without merit, but to receive grace we have to be willing to confess to God with a humble heart - when you are truly compelled and filled with the Holy Spirit you are driven to pursue the law and to strive for peace.  The law is perfect, man is not, but we must still strive for righteousness and can be lead closer to righteousness through the power of the Holy Spirit.

The Rabbi told me that The Holy Spirit is our guidepost - I agree - the Holy Spirit purges us so that we are holy.  No longer does the Spirit of God live in a Temple of stone and mortar, but we are a Temple to God and when the Spirit of God lives in our hearts we must live by his love - and strive to be righteous - when you have grace you are compelled to want to do right, to be a better person, to give more freely. T

The Holy Spirit has always existed and always will exist - his nature is infinite - HE is the Father and in the Son - Three in one.  The SPIRIT is spoken of in the Hebrew Scriptures and is tantamount in Jewish faith as the wisdom of God - The Spirit helped form the world - and all of creation.  

For verses on the Spirit at work

It seems unfathomable that on Pentecost God descended into the hearts of humanity - the Spirit worked beside them before - at the temple and in prophecy - but at Pentecost the breath of God descended on humanity in active love and the fire of truth.  Just think for a second - the breath of the Holy Spirit inside you is God living in your heart - what peace and hope and bold humility should that ignite in our souls!  In John 14 - Jesus promises to make a home with us in our hearts - The Holy Spirit is part of this promise - God is our home.  

This compels me to strive for peace - even if I fall short in striving for peace my character grows deeper roots in God's glorious love and the mercy of Christ and the wisdom of the SPIRIT and the Word.

John 14: Jesus Promises the Holy Spirit

¹⁵ “If you love me, you will keep my commandments. ¹⁶ And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Helper,^[f] to be with you forever, ¹⁷ even the Spirit of truth, whom the world cannot receive, because it neither sees him nor knows him. You know him, for he dwells with you and will be^[g] in you.
¹⁸ “I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you. ¹⁹ Yet a little while and the world will see me no more, but you will see me. Because I live, you also will live. ²⁰ In that day you will know that I am in my Father, and you in me, and I in you. ²¹ Whoever has my commandments and keeps them, he it is who loves me. And he who loves me will be loved by my Father, and I will love him and manifest myself to him.” ²² Judas (not Iscariot) said to him, “Lord, how is it that you will manifest yourself to us, and not to the world?” ²³ Jesus answered him, “If anyone loves me, he will keep my word, and my Father will love him, and we will come to him and make our home with him. ²⁴ Whoever does not love me does not keep my words. And the word that you hear is not mine but the Father's who sent me.

The Holy Spirit is more than our conscience.  God has given all of human creation a conscience - a moral reasoning to understand right and wrong - the Holy Spirit is a counselor, a guide, a map, a guardian - a peacekeeper in our hearts.  The Holy Spirit can only stay with us if we seek forgiveness and try to live peaceful lives - the Holy Spirit has a high tolerance for our sin by the blood of Christ's redemption - but if we blaspheme against the spirit we are condemning ourselves because we are choosing to forsake peace.

I struggle with peace of mind - I am always an advocate of peace with other people - I love God's creation and am blessed to serve others - but I have been in dark places of the soul where I cried out in hate - hate for myself and disgust that God did not move the way I thought he should - particularly when I was forsaken by my family - it took a long road to realize peace by the spirit is not safety in the world, but rather the unquenchable hope and surety that you are never along in obstacles - your soul is safe even in the troubles of the flesh and you are led to the promise of glory.

The past few months I was frustrated that I could not hear my intuition - the Holy Spirit is my intuition nine times out of ten - the whisper I need to tune into.  I am an INFJ - highly logical and analytical but in that range of emotion I also am driven by intuition.  When my intuition is off - I feel lost.  I prayed to God that I could hear the SPIRIT's will - instead all I heard was the worry and agonizing fear in my mind about temporal life affairs such as finances and job insecurity.  

God through the SPIRIT cares about these things, but the primary goal of God is saving our soul...when I was walking in the park I demanded 'God tell me your will!'  I heard a whisper shout: How can you hear me when you have so many voices shouting at the same time, set down your worry and rely on me.

I continue to work through this daily, but with each chipping away of worry I find release in the Spirit and the peace of God flows like a living river of hope into my soul - I am nourished and without fear.  

It is hard to know when the Holy Spirit is speaking to us - but if you listen and prayerfully ask for discernment God will give you clarity.  God is not a God of confusion but of peace.  We are the one's driven into fear.  The only fear we should have is displeasing God - the thing that displeases God the most (I think) is not confiding to HIM and speaking honestly in confession.  He'll wait, but the longer we wait - the more stress and anger we allow to build up.  It is like finding out you have cancer and ignoring it.  God can cleanse the pain and transform you by the SPIRIT - but we must be willing to fully submit.
 

When judging an insight from the Holy Spirit - ask: does it align with scripture and God's law - because God's law is still steadfast.  Christ obeyed the law for grace, but the law stands true.  Does the intuition bring you closer to God or to the world?  Often I do not like what the Spirit says - especially about worrying about temporal things because I am driven by the flesh - and the flesh is weak - seeing only temporal timelines instead of the infinite grace and majesty of God.

The world is so fractured today because so many people fight battles out of the flesh - and many of the battles are buffered by a false claim that The Holy Spirit is guiding them.  I look to the Middle East and the war in Syria, the persecution in Nazi Germany - when many who claimed to be Christians turned a blind eye (many Christians stood up - but any Christian filled with the Holy Spirit would find any such evil detestable and use the Spirit of love and the fruits of the Spirit to fight evil).

Many want to point fingers at the Church - Pentecost is the birthday of the church.  We are called by Christ to be the salt of the earth and a light to all the nations*(Isaiah, also in Luke 2-Song of Simeon) - a city on a hill...not a church of division and hate, bigotry and self-loathing, greed gospels and wars of state - Christianity is about love and peace - righteousness - yes - but grace is what we shall give through the grace of Christ.  We cannot allow the flesh and the princes of this world beckon our ears and hearts to beat - we need to listen to the SPIRIT of our heavenly KING.  When we are fully filled with the PEACE of the SPIRIT it is as a dove in flight - it overtakes you - you realize you have been chained in so much grief - grief that spent nothing by time and did nothing to fill your hunger for truth.  The Holy Spirit gives wisdom and truth, it gives the thirsty the cup of everlasting love and light - salvation and peace of Christ.

We are a city on a hill - not only as a beacon for how to live - Christ also is warning us that by not living the the SPIRIT of Truth - we are turning souls blind because they cannot perceive grace in the den of sin - they do not see love when Christians sow the seeds of hate and corruption.  We are called to a higher standard that the world - but we have an advocate in the SPIRIT who gives us strength for the race - if we are but willing to drink of HIS cup.

 Matthew 5: Salt and Light
¹³ “You are the salt of the earth, but if salt has lost its taste, how shall its saltiness be restored? It is no longer good for anything except to be thrown out and trampled under people's feet.
¹⁴ “You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden. ¹⁵ Nor do people light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a stand, and it gives light to all in the house. ¹⁶ In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that^[a] they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven.

 We are the light of the world - but we are but a beacon - empowered by the fire of the Holy Spirit who lights our paths and writes TRUTH on our hearts and commands us to walk in the way of Christ and love the law and seek truth in God.  The Holy Spirit compels us to follow the law by the love God provides as a father, but we are also given that abiding love of knowing that if we sin and return to God with a contrite heart - he will restore us - the power of the Spirit is our personal relationship - an anchor of light and power to God our Father who we worship and adore with praise and thanksgiving.




We will face trials and tribulations... issues of the flesh that test the spirit from loss of property...loss of limbs, loss of dignity in this world, but with the Holy Spirit we never lose our souls and we find love even in the tumult of an angry suffocating world of evil, malice and pain.  So when trials come do not let fear push you towards doubt, but lean in and cry to the Spirit who is there to help you endure the testing - The Holy Spirit is a refining fire that builds character even in difficult circumstances we are made whole by the SPIRIT of peace.  The Holy Spirit is the light to kindle an eternal flame to extinguish the darkest corners of all the earth and the aphotic desolation of our souls into love, peace and renewing grace by which we Praise God and seek HIS Righteous law and life.

Come Holy Spirit
Come Holy Spirit, fill the hearts of your faithful and kindle in them the fire of your love.
V. Send forth your Spirit, and they shall be created.
R. And You shall renew the face of the earth.

Strive for Peace

Strive for peace.  Christ wants us to strive for peace.  Peace is a tortuous path for humanity because we are so plugged into temporal constraints.  We are ruled by passions of anger, grief and fear.  I struggle to set aside worry - even though I know Christ has promised to lay my worry on His shoulders I clutch worry like a weapon, when I should be upholding the shield of Christ - which is promised to us in the Spirit. 

¹⁴ Strive for peace with everyone, and for the holiness without which no one will see the Lord. Hebrews 12:14

When we are driven by worry and fear we don't think clearly - we lash out, we work tirelessly with the fruits of our labors seemingly never producing enough on the vine.  We take the wrong risks and hold back from taking steps in faith that can lead us out of troubled waters. 

Today as I was deep in prayer the verse Hebrews 12:14 popped in my head.  I did not know the verse by heart - looking it up I found the practical spiritual advice of God.  I have been praying for peace, begging for Him to take away our worry - but until we strive for peace and accept the promises of Christ, God cannot move in our lives.

Peace starts with our own hearts and when we accept forgiveness from God we can have peace to love the entire world and pray for blessings and hope for all in the world, even those that condemn us.  Making every effort to live in peace does not mean standing idly by and watching injustice or avoiding to shout out against injustice - rather it is a call to love and to rest in indifference's working with ACTIVE love and peace rather than a fire of anger. 


Revenge yields revenge.  I saw a bumper sticker the other day - Justice is standing up with others sit down, but an eye for an eye makes the entire world blind.

Peace gives us discernment.  Rage is a destroying fire that only sows more destruction.  While sometimes we are called to arms to defend peace, peace is never meant to be a lasting war - especially a war with ourselves - God would rather we focus on helping others and following his word rather than spending our lives entrenched in the chaos of fear.  Fear of the Lord allows us to climb mountains and overcome trials and persevere - Fear of the world makes us weak and paralyzes us. 












On my birthday I was struggling with emotional pain from years of abuse bubbling up to the surface.  A lot of this as a result of my cousin's wedding - I was not invited (not my fault) but out of spite and their own hate for me.  I felt forsaken.  I asked God why I was ever born - I cried and wept and felt utterly broken because although I knew I had been righteous and kind and striven for peace with them - I was forsaken, bruised and battered and make to feel worse than dirt. 

My mom reminded me that she loved me and also said 'God loves you.'  I said 'Yeah, well God loves everyone.'  'So what' - this is not my typical nature - but that brokenness and heartache of losing people I trusted and loved - feeling that betrayal left me raw.  For a second I took God's love for granted I did not see it as miraculous - I chose the forsaken thorns of the world over the rose of God's crown of love and forgiveness.  I felt abandoned - I asked for God to forgive me the next day - I know His love is enough - but when everyone has turned against you and you see injustice it is easy to push back peace and to rely on worry - to burn with the pain of fear and revenge.  The Holy Spirit can provide peace even when betrayal cuts the deepest but we must trust that peace and let it work through us so we can be peaceful with humanity.

I continue to fear the future - I am frustrated by my job, my lack of good housing and other problems - but God's love is bigger than our problems and in eternity the smallest and biggest worries are nothing in God's glory.  God wants to help heal us - are we willing to be healed.  We have to strive for HIS peace - accept HIS gifts

Trust in God's Never Failing Love

I often invoke my prayers to the Lord with pleas not to forget me, 'O Lord do not forsake me.'  I beg God to stay with me and guard my heart through the Holy Spirit.  The desperation is my call is the bridge of fear to faith, desolation and consolation.  In my personal life I have been forsaken by my biological father and many who should have stood up for me - as a child I faced abused, yet God has stayed faithful - he isn't going anywhere.  Still I panic - I fear that he will not help me or will turn deaf ears on my cries - I scrutinize my self worth under the sharp edged sword of the residual pain of family who told me I was worthless.  While I always know I am not worthless to God, I still grapple with the fear of rejection - I yearn to please God and rely on HIM as my FATHER, but time and again I fall short - I let fear keep me anxious - I fail to see God's plan as an eternal timeline - allowing fear to steal my joy in temporal matters.

God does not forget HIS creation - God acts at the right time, even if in the darkest nights of the soul we, like Jesus on the Cross, cry out 'why have you forsaken me.'  God is faithful even when we are not.  He is ready to transform our hearts in love and to guide us.  In times of testing he stills our soul with resilient peace so we will endure the storm - able to be refined from the fire, not burned by anxious hopelessness.  God is our candle in the darkness and the Holy Spirit never fails to guide us if we implore HIS help.  Jesus forgives us time and again and wants our love, our friendship and for us to desire a relationship of love - not merely for the reward of heaven, which is a fruit of the faith, but because of the peace and care of a perfect relationship in Christ.

In previous posts I have discussed forgiveness.  Jesus tells Peter that we should forgive seventy times seven - 77 times plus!  I think like most of Jesus's teachings, this command is full of depth and encompasses many truths about forgiveness in one simple command - the command is straightforward - demanding what seems impossible - yet Christ does forgive us our every sin when we ask.  I also think the statement refers to the fragility of the human heart and the emotional process of forgiveness.  It took me at least seventy times of searching my soul and working out buried emotions to forgive the relatives that forsook me and my mom.  Each time I dealt with the anger and forgave them I chipped a tiny piece of the pain off my shoulder - each time we forgive it is like an antibiotic - it works to cleanse us from infection - however if we are not prepared to make room in our heart for Christ - the infection of anger can return and once again we must fight it with the fervor of love and the Holy Spirit.

I mention forgiveness because often times our fear of being forsaken is tied to forgiveness - either our desire for forgiveness or the wounds of betrayal that have broken a soul.  I have had my father, uncles and cousins forsake me for no reason except a love of money and a hateful heart.  I forgive them - it took a long time and in that forgiveness I bless them that they might turn their hearts to God to be healed for a broken spirit is root of spite and only God can cleanse us, renew us and remake us.

God will not forsake us - God loves us - he loves us so much that He gave HIS only begotten son to die on the cross that we might have life - not just life - but abundant life.

As I deal with a bad housing situation and other frustrations - I turn to God in desperation - desperate for HIS saving grace, desperate for financial help - at the same time I feel guilty for asking for help when so many are suffering.

God created the entire universe and beyond - while we should always be willing to sacrifice for the least among us and lay down our life for friends and give hospitality to strangers - to think that God cannot solve our problems and the world's at the same time is small thinking.  God wants us to pray for others and minister and help our fellow man - but God through Christ has proven HE desires to provide for all His children and will if we let HIM

God has taught me that he only answers prayers if they bring us closer to Him, that doesn't mean He doesn't provide - no God provides abundantly but HIS way is always the best way and unless a want helps us grow in faith and serve HIM it is not always answered.  It is hard to understand why some prayers I cried out for help were not answered, God has shown me it is because he has a bigger and better plan than I could ever imagine.

At times when I fear the financial burdens of my life and debate my self-worth in the weight of broken dreams I cry out to the Lord and I wonder where He is - am I selfish and rotten to ask for help when the world is suffering, has God, my FATHER in heaven forsaken me.

God has continuously given me a resounding NO!  God does not forget us - he knows us better than we know ourselves, he wants the best for us and works for our highest good if we just give him the reins and seek communion with HIS SPIRIT.  This isn't easy, but God will provide and the SPIRIT with sustain you in love.

What God does forget are our sins - he renounces them and absolves us of them.  God sees our best self and we need to aim to see that too and in loving ourselves the way God loves us may we go out into the world in peace to love and serve as Christ commands us to do.

Anger steals Joy

Psalm 51: 
For you will not delight in sacrifice, or I would give it;
    you will not be pleased with a burnt offering.
¹⁷ The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit;
    a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise.

 

Anger steals joy and joy is a reflection of God's grace - joy is something we must adhere to in times of turmoil and peace - not as a facade but with an open contrite heart of endurance.  Anger often comes from the seed of betrayal and sin.

Christ knows the weight of betrayal and the hardship of desolation - yet he overcame the temporary hardships by love for the Father and for all of creation.  He accepted a crown of thorns so that we might inherit the rose of HIS salvation. 

Forgiveness is the most powerful act of love of the spirit - redemption is tearing asunder the pain and betrayal, and bitter darkness of the wounds of sin.  Sin is a wound, not only against God but against our own flesh and soul.  Psychologically sin is more than just an arbitrary list but is a living breathing toxin for your body.  When someone has wronged you - the sting breaks down your trust and leads to higher stress levels.  When we sin it changes our psychological wiring to be more negative and bitter - it leaves us fractured - even if we like to sweep our dirty laundry to the back of the closet it is still there.

Forgiveness - is not easy - it means casting aside a debt, letting go of the burden - the burden is anger.  I speak from experience.  I am naturally a forgiving person but years and years of psychological abuse - negative hate spouted at me from family members, my house, legacy and hopes smashed and shattered - there came a point in the process I became bitter.

I want to make a point that when someone wrongs you - you have every right to get upset - to pull away from the situation and close yourself off - this is a built in stimulus - I think it is a divine protection in a way.  

What is wrong is when you bury the hurt instead of dealing with it (cognitive therapy, analyzing the wrong behaviors, praying to God about the pain) because then you attach that bitterness - that scorn as part of your anger.  You allow the rose to be overshadowed by the thorns.  We all deal with anger and betrayal in different ways - but the root cause is toxic energy.  Like other toxins our body needs to get rid of anger's hold otherwise it grows like a cancer.  When you are more concerned about revenge instead of justice - toxic anger begins to penetrate the soul like a disease - it leaves you in a war with yourself - and a war with those around you.

I have every reason to be upset that my family betrayed me and my mom.  We only showed them love and compassion - yet they returned it with jealous hate and constant betrayal.  I am still fighting debts because of their selfishness.  For years I tried to get recompense from my stepmother for the money my father owed me from his estate - I bartered with God and tried everything to get her to pay.  By justice she should have followed his will, but when I realized she wouldn't I still kept trying to fix the evil within another and barter with it - allowing myself to allow the rage to pent up and nearly erupt.  I felt betrayed that God wouldn't work through my prayers to get my stepmother to do the right thing.  

The part that burned into my flesh - I was keenly aware that God recognized that I had been abused without merit and I saw the lack of recompense as inaction.  In truth God had more important priorities on his agenda - healing my soul from the wounds - I felt the Holy Spirit comfort me - but I was angry and felt alone.  I let bitterness tear me apart - I said I forgave - but we cannot forgive when we keep reopening wounds and allowing them to get reinfected.  We cannot heal and find true justice until we turn the matter fully over to God.  I saw this when I read Job 42 - Job did not regain HIS fortunes until he forgave his friends (who were really his enemies) - the primary fortune God wants to provide is HIS spirit because it can give us strength and peace - JOY in all times.

Does this mean you should not work for justice by the law or negotiation - no - but when justice fails or another person refuses to honor their obligations - it is better to turn over the betrayal to God - for HE is always faithful.

Some debts on earth cannot be paid.  When you forgive don't ask for restoration of the past - but rather for God to work out something better for you right now - sometimes that something better is the simple but profound peace of the Holy Spirit.

When we are wronged we must contemplate the pain and look to God - for how often do we sin against HIM, missing the mark and falling short of his ideals - yet God forgives us as far as the east is from the west through HIS son Jesus Christ.  

The Lord's Prayer commands us that we must forgive others as God forgives us - Jesus tells us in the scriptures how fundamental forgiveness and repentance is to moving forward in our spiritual and life journey.  How can we move into the present and future living in the past.  

Forgiveness means you turn over the matter to God and you remove its control from your life - you remove the bitterness against to the betrayal - Forgiveness does not mean you condone an action but rather you remove its chains and cut the cords of its oppressive force from you.  Forgiveness is setting yourself free from the bondage of bitterness.

The same can be said of seeking forgiveness.  We often are desperate for redemption but our prides demands that we dismiss our sins as unimportant - we often like to where the cloak of righteousness - concealing the dark cancer in our souls.  Sometimes we genuinely don't comprehend the sin - God will reveal our sin to us through the Spirit if we ask so that we may confess the sin and move on.

God wants to give us GRACE because God loves us and has plans for us - plans to help grow his kingdom with mercy and peace - and how can we be useful if we are crippled by bitterness clinging to our anger and sin.  I know it is hard for me to forgive myself for past mistakes - some are not 'sins' but their were mistakes that held me back - God has reminded me through the Spirit that if HE is willing to forgive me and remove that stigma then I am languishing in pride if I don't accept the grace and ask for guidance to move forward in my life.

The most important thing in seeking forgiveness from God is a contrite heart - this is a theme throughout the Hebrew Scriptures and the New Testament - the Law has rules for sacrifices - but the purest sacrifice to God is a contrite heart - a heart that genuinely wants to be whole with The Holy Spirit and to have a relationship with God.  A contrite heart is honest - it might not be overstated, it doesn't have to tear apart clothes and wail in tribulation (it can if you are doing it from a place of sincerity) - but rather it is an act of love and desperate hope in LOVE - God's LOVE powers forgiveness and when we forgive it has to be an act of love.

If you are struggling in your relationship with God and your daily life pray for forgiveness and work to forgive others by letting go of the anger.  This may be a process - it took me processing through the hurt layer by layer for years before finally washing it clean - but I worked through it - I did not bury it - when I did all I was left with was resentment and frustration.

God wants to work through you - HE can heal all wounds and restore a broken spirit, renewing the spirit in peace - but we must play an active role.

God always uses our circumstances to teach lessons - even if we have fallen from HIM, God is working to restore you - but YOU have to accept the gift of grace and be willing to follow HIS prescription for renewal.  None of us like to get our engines fixed at the car dealership - but if we bring our car into the dealer we can leave with the engine in better shape.  God uses our mistakes through redemption - helping us to grow in wisdom and strength so we learn how the weight of sin affects another and we work to amend it.  When God takes away the pain from the victims of abuse - he is saying - 'YOU are BRIGHTER than your abuse, shine like a candle of hope' - meaning a victim can grow in character like a roaring lion of hope free from bondage or they can stay chained in the mental prison of anger and fear.

I saw a person who wronged me at the grocery store today and I avoided then- not out of anger this time, but because in spite of all their hate towards me - I am bigger than the hate of this world - God pulls me into a love and I don't have room to rent for anger - because it is a parasite that takes your joy away.

Life is more than breathing and heart beats - what good is a breath without anticipation of life abundant, what good is a heart beat if it doesn't not embrace the joy and peace of the Holy Trinity and loves with a pure heart.  Create in me a Clean HEART my Father and help guide me to your ways - and not be bound by the hate of the world.

God Alone is Holy Prayer of Praise

Who are we poor sinners

God alone is holy

Who are we wretched and at war

God alone is peace

Who are we angry at the curse of the world

Forget the bounty of your blessings

Let us turn our eyes to your kingdom on earth and in heaven

So those who hunger may be fed in the spiritual hope of your love and find life in the spirit

God is a God of mighty works and a compassionate sacred heart that is moved by love

God shows mercy on all creation and cries out for souls lost in the wilderness

Only in his life can we live in safety - only in HIS grace can we find salvation and be willing to release the bitter marks of the crosses we bear

In suffering God refines us, transforms us by the energy of love, and compassion

Christ suffered so we might live

When we suffer we cannot lose hope, but hope in the infinite goodness and fortitude of Christ, God our Father and the Holy Spirit who sustains brittle bones

God alone is holy, God alone is good

We find peace in his Spirit in troubled times

Joy in HIS blessings

Life in HIS creation

Love in his grace

And a shield of endurance in times of testing

God never leaves us, God alone stands beside us as a friend, a God and a Father and Savior

God alone is holy

Praise the blessings of God

Prayer of Thanksgiving

God my Father, you have adopted me as your heir through Christ and the Grace of your perfect love.  Nothing can compare to your love.  Your love is greater than the universe, for your love formed the galaxies and all that is within the manifold depths of creation.  The wonders of YOUR creation were formed by just a breath.  You command 'let it be' and it is done.

 The Grand Canyon is a symphony resounding in the colors of your creation, you give life to the barren lands and fill empty hearts with your divine love.  No one comes to you is left empty - you fill the night with millions of stars - you are the true north who guides our steps and always keeps watch over our soul.  You preserve our soul and cleanse our sins with the blood of salvation and healing waters of your grace.  You do not forget the oppressed nor take away the hope of those in desolation - while nations fight you build a kingdom of love. 

Call me to your service so I can serve you as your service to humanity and all of creation is more than we could ever deserve.  What can our lips speak to glorify you - yet still you desire our love - you have mercy on us and want relationship with your children.  You formed us in the womb and in the weaknesses of the flesh you bind our wounds.  I praise you God for building my character in trial and loving me tenderly as a child and granting me courage and perseverance, compassion and faith to accept your grace.  I thank you for your love, it is the root of all good things.  Thank you for blessings - your blessings pump life into every heartbeat and give our soul immortality - even though we deserve to die as the weeds in a fire.  You give us instead a fire of sustaining spirit - a Holy Spirit - a lover who heals the soul.  You pour so many blessings we could write millions of books, words and songs and it would not come close to blessing you with gratitude.  So I bow down before you, I humbly call you friend, my God and my FATHER and ask you to stay with me, to infuse me with your grace, to fill me with you love - I praise you, I love you and I need you always.  Thanks be to God, our creator, author of salvation through Christ and the infinite possibilities of hope.

Prayer of Praise and Hope

Thank you Jesus for your SPIRIT of love

Thank you Jesus for healing the wounds of the broken hearted

Thank you Jesus for walking beside us through the fire of trial

Thank you for refining us to be purified in your LOVE, Truth and Redemption

Thank you Jesus in testing to build our character as a fortress of your grace, not of bitterness

Thank you Jesus for bearing our sins and wiping our eyes when we cry tears of agony

For you know what it feels like to be betrayed, lost, forgotten and alone

Thank you Jesus that in YOUR time of persecution and crisis you did not lean on doubt

Thank you Jesus for having FAITH in YOUR FATHER, GOD

And offering yourself as a perfect sacrifice for the remission of sins, a living hope and a beacon of trust

So that we know you are our redeemer

Thank God our REDEEMER Lives

Thank YOU Christ for teaching us to love our neighbors with a pure and sincere heart and actively pursuing the sustaining fire of love over the destructive fire of hate that divides and corrupts, corrodes and demeans – your love brings us together in hope and truth – a power of mercy and grace, justice and peace.

Let the beacon of Christ’s light guide us in the darkest nights of the soul

Thank you Jesus for teaching us to forgive, so that we may find the grace of forgiveness in your sacred heart

Ignite a passion in our souls to pursue social justice, to heal the afflicted, mend the broken through YOUR example of compassion

Thank YOU Jesus that we can stand before you as friends, rather than slaves to the law.  In this friendship we find the beauty of the law – working to serve your GLORY, yet living in the trust that in our imperfect hearts we are perfected in YOU. 

Thanks be God, Christ and the Holy Spirit for guiding us the ways of righteousness – even when the road is rocky you guide us to safety – and if the world’s persecutes the flesh, you have protected our soul for eternity.

Thanks be to the Holy Trinity

Thanks be to the Holy Trinity for the Living Waters

Let any you thirst drink your the cup of salvation and be fed with your spiritual food

Thank you Jesus for promising that all of our sustaining needs will be met, food and water, housing and clothing.

Greed tries to steal our comfort, and worry powers fear

Jesus take away our worry – LET OUR Hearts not be Troubled, may they find rest in you

Help us to love our neighbor – breaking bread with sinners so they might now the goodness of the Lord, helping the oppressed, guiding the weak and standing up for the widow, orphan, the broken…help us to guide the lost back home to YOU

Thank YOU JESUS for OUR daily bread, for the bread of your everlasting covenant and the healing waters of your cup that cleanse our soul.  Thank you for becoming a sacrifice so that we may be free – Thank you JESUS – Our Living Hope, our Life and our SALVATION

Jesus without you I am nothing.  My bones are weak and fractured, my muscles ache, my heart is confused and my mind is trouble.  The flesh tempts me to succumb to the world…YOUR Holy Name, The Holy Spirit and God our Father ignite a unquenchable sustaining fire to sow LOVE in the world – so that darkness will be overtaken by the pure true light of your covenant – Grant me the courage to set aside Fear to follow YOU and to TRUST in Your Holy Name and to love my neighbor as you love me.

Help us to have the courage to renounce the evil of the flesh.  Grant us the power to have active compassion on the sick, weak, hungry, lost sheep, those who are affected by war, famine, grief and all tribulations.  In our blessings, for you own everything and it is by grace we receive, grant us the purity of heart to love our neighbor and serve the least.  

Thank you Christ for crowning yourself with the sorrows of the world so we may be set free.  You are a perfect king who serves his dominion with peace and love.

Christ help us to work to heal the planet and be grateful for your creation and work to protect it.  Thank you for ecology and our wilderness - may we use resources for the highest good, not short term greed.

Thank YOU CHRIST for transforming our hearts and our souls and leading us as sheep so that we can love and serve you and work to sow love in a broken world.  For only Love heals all wounds.  Only in your safety and shelter will we find eternal refuge. 

Renew us in your LIVING Waters, may the Holy Spirit renewal our baptismal covenant to follow the LOVE of Christ so our paths will be straight even in the chaos of the world.  We must walk through the darkness - but never without the light of the SPIRIT who abides in our hearts - whispering in the strength of the wind - O Jesus Christ - the light of the nations and Glory of Israel, go out into the world in peace and sow HIS seeds of LOVE