God is our HOME

 


Deep in prayer, I turned the weight of my anxious heart over to the Holy Spirit.  Lost and broken in spirit, I searched God’s wisdom for guidance about my life and repairing the splinters inside my soul.  As I cast over worry into the Spirit of Truth, peace rained down on me and in that moment of complete fullness and hope my intuition instructed me to read the verse: 'John 14:23'
I often turn to God’s Word in despair and it never fails to comfort me – but this verse spoke directly to the heart of my problem.  


^{John 23} Jesus replied, “Anyone who loves me will obey my teaching. My Father will love them, and we will come to them and make our home with them. ²⁴ Anyone who does not love me will not obey my teaching. These words you hear are not my own; they belong to the Father who sent me.
²⁵ “All this I have spoken while still with you. ²⁶ But the Advocate, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, will teach you all things and will remind you of everything I have said to you. ²⁷ Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.

As I opened my Bible to John 14:23, my eyes scanning the verse, my soul felt the Spirit of God at work - I knew I was guided to this verse as both a promise and renewal of hope.
I have read the Gospel of John on many occasions and am familiar with the story arcs and spiritual themes in the Gospel.  However at the time of this prayer I was unfamiliar with this exact verse.  I know it was a message from The Holy Spirit.

My family is broken - I have suffered abuse from the flesh and blood I thought I could trust.  I won't go into the depths of the family trauma - to suffice it to say my relatives forsook me and my mother.   The weight of that sort of pain and loss of your family unit weighs heavy on the psychology and emotional defense of a person.  When we are emotionally wounded by anothers anger through trauma and abuse, psychologically while we can buffer our defenses, we are vulnerable – we try to cope instead of healing – burying emotions so deep we only are left with our shell of hope – our souls ruled by a toxic anxiety and fear.  In this state you may trust God’s love, but oftentimes victims feel unworthy to accept it – or they accept the gift but don’t open the box. 

When I was young, around six – I realized my father was mentally ill – I recognized even though my father loved me in the depths of his heart – he was too fractured and too erratic to act in the role of father – I had a cognizance at that time of peace, through the Holy Spirit (I did not understand that at the time) of peace in the issue and forgiveness.  I turned to God and ask God to be my father – to serve as the FATHER I needed on earth because my dad was so ruled by anger and chaos (mental illness from medicine he took for Crohn’s Disease) – my dad had a dis-ease – and I knew I needed a father to lean on.  While in my youth I clung onto God as my FATHER – in the past five years I struggled with the shards of pain and doubt of conflict and lost dreams – I gave up on myself- I allowed bitterness to enter my heart – I decided to be so overcome with grief about the abuse of being disinherited my human father that I turned away from God – MY FATHER.

God created us out of LOVE and Our Father wants to make HIS home with us, but we need to clean our hearts and release our anxiety and fear and let him in fully.  God, through Christ’s blood and the peace of revelation in the Holy Spirit is willing to work to counsel us – to help heal us – but we have to be willing to let HIM in and accept the gifts of hope, love, grace, healing and forgiveness that the HOLY TRINITY has to offer.  The Holy Spirit is a counselor – who is ready to guide us, Christ is our redeemer – and God acts a perfect Father who will never forsake you.  When you let God move into your life – He will never leave you thirsty – but you must drink of the cup of HIS Living Waters.
John 14:23 is a reminder to me that no matter was dis-ease there is in the world – it is a temporary obstacle.  God may call us on crooked paths, but he will never lead us astray – rather he will use the twists and turns to teach us to be strong in character and fortitude.  God knows the desires of our heart – like a true father he works to teach us and discipline us in LOVE, he wants us to find success and to find joy – but our first priority is loving HIM because God is our family – He is OUR FATHER.  

If we continue to look to Spirit of Truth, seeking counsel in the Word of Scripture and in prayer God will enter our lives.  The Holy Spirit lives within us – what better grace can we find – When we suffer – God feels our pain – he knows it – remember we are not alone.

My Prayer
Lord, I invite you into my life.  I need your unfailing compass to guide my heart and my steps closer to your will for my life.  Teach me, refine me, prepare me and I will follow your way.  Holy Spirit clear all negative thoughts that block me from receiving your wisdom and peace – the world is dark and lonely, but your SPIRIT’s core is a ceaseless flame of glory that can ignite our souls to love and serve.  Teach us to trust you and to turn over our egos which are weak and caustic, rather in relinquishing fear bind us in the confidence of your truth and light – love and salvation – a cross roads is just a reminder of resurrection and living hope you kindle – a flame that stays lit in wind, rain and darkness of night. 

The road may twist and turn, confusing your paths but if you stay set on God's light - the light of Christ will lead you - sometimes God's paths seem confused because HE is not of the world, we have  a limited scope and perspective - we need to be willing to trust God our FATHER to be our GPS